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 Ewoks and Care Bears


Chapter 2

Jack stepped away from the Stargate, following his team. The sun was bright above them, he stopped long enough to don his sunglasses. "Oh, look! Trees! What a surprise."

Daniel looked over his shoulder, rolled his eyes. "Yeah, imagine that."

"Tell me again why we're here...in the midst of this...forest," Jack said, his voice betraying his annoyance.

"Naquadah," Sam replied.

"And the possible location of an ancient Furling settlement," Daniel added, his enthusiasm barely contained. His eyes were dancing, he was practically bouncing on his toes. "According to my research, this planet was once controlled by the Furlings."

"Right. Rocks and...rocks. Radar, talk to me."

"Nothing to say, boss," Casey replied easily. She linked her hand with Daniel's, who was already following the narrow and barely visible trail that led away from the Stargate.

"Whoa! Hold up, you two!" Jack ordered. He glanced around. "T-man, what do you think?"

"I believe we are alone, O'Neill," Teal'c replied.

Jack nodded. "Okay. I'll take point. Teal'c has the six. Eyes open, campers."

"According to the UAV, the ruins weren't too far from the 'gate," Daniel theorized. "This...path...or what there is of it, might have been a wide road at one time."

"It seems packed down," Sam agreed.

When Casey stumbled slightly, it was the edge of a stone that had been the cause.

"Paving stones!" Daniel crowed. "I knew it! We should probably watch for any other architectural evidence...the forest would have overtaken it when the city was abandoned, but there should still be some sort of ruins."

Jack glanced over his shoulder to find that Daniel was about to pass him. "Slow down, Daniel. Let's not get too hasty. Might be traps or some such thing."

"I doubt it," Daniel argued. "The Furlings would have used their Stargate for commerce and travel between their settlements. They were highly advanced technologically. I don't think you're going to-"

A loud snapping sound filled the air. A second later, Daniel was suspended from a nearby tree, hanging upside down. Before Jack could open his mouth to toss words of rebuke at the archaeologist, which had been his intention, he was hanging from a tree on the other side of the path. Sam and Teal'c had frozen in place. Casey had been so surprised that she stepped backwards, into yet another trap.

"You were saying?" Jack grumped, swinging slowly in a circle. "You can cut us down anytime, Carter. No need for all the blood in my body to fill my head."

"That would take a lot of blood," Daniel snipped. "Considering how empty your head is."

"Hey, wise-ass, who said we didn't have to worry about booby traps?"

"I highly doubt that these traps were set by the Furlings thousands of years ago," Daniel retorted.

"Which means someone else set them!" Jack snapped in return. The comment brought a moment of silence as the team contemplated this new bit of information.

Teal'c had immediately taken on a posture of protection, carefully scanning around them. Sam raced to Casey, who happened to be the closest. The seer tumbled to the ground, regained her feet, her P90 gripped tightly.

Daniel was brushing himself off when the whisper of something flying through the air broke the silence that had engulfed the team. A dozen long arrows embedded themselves in the nearby tree trunks.

Before Sam could reach Jack, the team was surrounded. Even upside down Jack could tell that these...bipeds...weren't exactly human. They were too furry for that. Their faces were flat, although their noses and mouths were rounded into something that resembled a snout...almost like the face of a chimpanzee...no, more like a gorilla...no, that wasn't right either. Bear. They resembled bears, he decided . Wearing pants and vests of leather, their arms, chests, feet, throat...even their faces...were covered with dark fur.

"Holy Hannah!" Sam whispered.

Daniel held up both hands, the fingers of one still wrapped tightly around his journal. Motioning that he was going to open the book, he flipped the red cover open. Without taking his eyes off of the...creatures...who watched him closely, he pointed to the page. Then offered the journal to the nearest creature.

One hairy, long-fingered hand accepted the book. The creature's dark eyes widened as it examined the cuneiform symbols that covered the page. He signaled, and two of the creatures lowered Jack to the ground.

"We come in peace," Daniel said calmly, his arms extended outward, a show of trust. "We're explorers, and we mean you no harm."

"Don't know the language?" Jack asked, still pissed that the archaeologist had managed to lead the team right into a series of traps...conveniently forgetting that he'd been on point.

"No one that I know has ever heard the language. I asked Thor about it," Daniel replied, "And he said that the Furlings and the Asgard had had little direct communication, so he had never actually heard their language spoken."

"So how are we supposed to communicate with these people?" Casey asked, warily eyeing the men who held very large bows, fitted now with very long, pointed arrows. She moved slowly toward her Husband, reaching out for him automatically, taking comfort from the warmth of his fingers as they closed around hers.

One of the men started up the path the team had been following. Turned around, jerked his head in the direction he had been walking.

"I think they want us to follow," Daniel said quietly.

"Yeah, I get that," Jack replied. "Nice and easy, campers. Let's not become shish-ka-bobs today, shall we? Daniel, find a way to let these guys know we aren't going to fight them...unless they force us into it."

Daniel snorted. "Jack, before you could bring your P90 up, you'd be dead." He nodded slightly at the men behind them.


"If they had wished us harm, we would already be dead," Teal'c said. "The arrows they fired at us were a warning."

"I agree, Teal'c," Daniel replied immediately.

Jack heaved a pained sigh, turned loose of the P90 he'd been holding with a death-grip, letting the weapon fall to his side. Started up the path once again, his teammates following closely behind. Another glance over his shoulder had him sighing again, this time with relief. Those nasty arrows were now pointed at the ground, not the backs of him and his team.

"This is really fascinating," Daniel said, watching their captors. "These...people...could be related to, maybe even the source of, the stories and myths about Sasquatch."

"Who?" Jack said, his mind busy working out the logistics of an escape.



"Think about it, Jack! These...um...warriors, fit the descriptions given by those who claimed to have seen a Sasquatch. The name 'Sasquatch' is taken from the Salish Indians of the area of the country where the sightings have been made. And according to those legends, entire 'tribes', or 'clans' of the creatures lived in the dense woods of the Cascade Mountains," Daniel said.

"So the Goa'uld brought them here? Why?" Jack asked.

"Why do the Goa'uld do anything? A show of power...probably needed slaves," Daniel replied with a shrug. "The fact that they recognized Furling cuneiform is surprising," the archaeologist admitted.

"They did?"

Daniel nodded. "The...uh...guy...who looked at my journal-" He stopped when he realized that the furry creature was still holding his personal diary. Pushed his glasses up absently. "He seemed to recognize the marks, at least. It's possible that this group broke free of their Goa'uld enslavement, and somehow wound up here. If they found the Furling ruins, they might have settled nearby."

"Right. We need to get back to that 'gate and out of here," Jack replied.

"Jack! This is the perfect opportunity to prove that Bigfoot really exists!" Daniel exclaimed.

Anything he might have said, which wouldn't have been complimentary, was forgotten when Jack caught sight of a group of huts. Small, round structures with pointed straw roofs. And clustered around those buildings were more furry creatures. Even from the distance he could see the svelte, hour-glass feminine forms. They weren't dressed, their breasts, while covered with pastel-shaded fur, hung free. He amended that thought immediately...there weren't any sagging boobs in the lot! They were all perky and round...

When his glance dropped to the apex of long, shapely, fur-covered legs, he wasn't surprised to see the hint of womanhood, the barely there cleft leaving no doubt that these...women...were built exactly like human females. Just...furrier.

And what fur! Thick and soft looking, the colors were astounding. Blues, greens, pinks, reds, yellows. Amazingly enough, every woman...er...female, Jack corrected himself, seemed to have a tattooed symbol on her stomach.

"Wow," Daniel whispered.

"Indeed," Teal'c replied.

Casey was still holding Daniel's hand, Sam had instinctively stepped closer to Teal'c, since he had been just behind her on the path.

While the faces of the men were more animal-like, the women were very humanoid in appearance. The fur on their faces seemed to be thinner, giving a hint of pink skin beneath the hair.

"Greetings," one of the women, a beautiful specimen with dark red fur, said softly. The other women closed in around her.

Jack glanced at Daniel. "Well?"

"No clue," the archaeologist mumbled. "I'm sorry, I don't understand you," he said, speaking in Goa'uld. It had been one language that seemed to be universal.

The red-furred female tipped her head backwards. Made a low, growling noise.

"We're peaceful explorers," Daniel said hurriedly. "We-"

"You speak the tongue of the Evil Ones," she snapped.

"Only because it is a language that seems to be held common among the people who were stolen from Earth...er...the First World. Many people were taken from there," Daniel explained carefully.

"You know of the First World?"

"It's our home," Daniel replied.

Dark eyes went wide. "You have uncovered the Chappa'ai?"


"Interesting. When we had been informed of the overthrow of Ra, we had assumed that the slaves of Earth would be free to develop as they were meant to...without further interference."

Daniel frowned. "You know about the uprising?"

"Not personally," the creature smiled. "But it is in our history. Our leaders had hoped that the First World would remain free."

"We still are free," Daniel replied. "We discovered the Stargate...er...Chappa'ai many years ago. But it was only recently, about nine years ago, that we understood what it was, what it could do. We found Ra on Abydos, and destroyed him. We've destroyed many Goa'uld."

"Interesting," Red repeated. "We had feared that after the Goa'uld had...stolen...all that the Ancients left behind, they would be unstoppable."

"It's not been easy," Daniel admitted. "There are many Goa'uld System Lords who still rule through intimidation and terror."

Red looked at Casey and Sam appraisingly. "Do your females not speak?"

Daniel smiled. "They speak. I...we are known as SG-1. My name is Daniel Jackson. This man," he pointed at Jack, "is our leader, Colonel Jack O'Neill. The other man-"

"The Jaffa," Red said, eyeing Teal'c warily.

"Yes, he is Jaffa. He denounced Apophis, to whom he had been First Prime, as the false god he was. Teal'c joined us in our battle against the Goa'uld; his hope is to free all Jaffa from their slavery to the Goa'uld."

Red nodded.

"The woman beside him is Major Samantha Carter."

"And the gifted one beside you?"

Daniel started, glanced at the slender seer, saw the same look of surprise that he was certain showed on his face. "My Wife, Casey," he said, too stunned to remember to keep her status as his Wife unknown for the time being.

Casey cocked her head sideways. "Very old...your people are very, very old," she said softly.

Red smiled again. "Yes, we are." She returned her attention to Daniel. "If that man," she pointed to Jack, "is your leader, why does he not speak for you?"

"He doesn't know the language...he is a warrior. I am a scholar. I am able to...communicate...with those we meet." Daniel explained.

The woman...creature...studied the team. "What does Mah-jor Kah-ar-ter do?" she asked, her accent as she struggled to pronounce Sam's name making it sound almost singsonged.

"She's an astrophysicist. She's one of the most talented scientists of our world," Daniel replied.

"Your group is quite...interesting."

Daniel couldn't help but grin. "That's not usually how we're described," he said.

A low chuckle filled the air. "No, it is not."

Casey smiled. She'd sensed that one of the women near them was psychic. Possibly more than one. Apparently this red-furred creature was a strong seer.

"Come, let us talk. It has been a very long time since a Furling has spoken with one from the First World."

Daniel gasped. "Furling?"

Jack looked from Red to Daniel and back again. "Uh...care to share the news, Danny?"

Eyes wide, Daniel turned to Jack. "They're Furlings!"

"Not Sasquatch?"

"No." Daniel shook his head. "Furlings."


"To say the least," Casey said, her own eyes wide. "One of the oldest civilizations around."

"You notice that they're not very technologically advanced," Jack pointed out.

"Remember the Nox?" Daniel asked softly.

Jack frowned. Those little forest fairies had proven to be a bit more advanced than appearances had indicated. "Right."

Red had waited patiently while the team members spoke quickly to one another. She reached out and put her hand on Daniel's arm. "Come."

The circle of females seemed to open, and Red led the still shocked team toward a long, low building with a steeply thatched roof. All of the members of SG-1 noted the attention that Jack seemed to be getting from the group. All of the Furling females pushed as close to him as possible, cutting Sam and Teal'c off from the rest of the group, as Jack followed after Daniel and Casey. The two soldiers shared a look of concern, fearful that this was a means of separating the team.

Once inside the building, Red stood behind the large, round firepit that took up the center of the long room. Four of the females hurriedly added wood to the embers that smoldered within the pit. In minutes a fire was warming the slightly chilly air. Red held her arms out, palms upwards, closed her eyes, and began to hum. Each of the women who had followed the team inside did the same...within seconds a lilting, multi-layered harmony resonated around them.

Jack took note that only three of the males, he was assuming they were males, had entered the building, and they stood nervously near the door. Each feminine face he examined smiled at him...almost as if they were flirting. It was impossible not to smile back at the prettiest of the group. Several actually batted their eyelashes at him, something he'd read about, heard about, but had never actually seen. He unconsciously stood straighter, squared his shoulders. Grinned at the few whispers that his actions stirred.

Red had lowered her arms, and was smiling at the team now, although her attention seemed to be focused on Jack. "My name is She-Who-Sees-What-Cannot-Be-Seen. I welcome you to our village, Daniel Jackson," she said, smiling at the archaeologist.

That was one hell of a name, and one he'd be better off not to try to pronounce. He could only hope that he wouldn't slip and call her 'Red', as he had already labeled her in his mind. Sort of like Jack does, he thought, immediately pushing that rather annoying and slightly disturbing realization from his mind. "Thank you for your warm greeting," he replied.

"Please, sit, and tell us how you have come to visit us here." Red motioned to the woven mats that circled the firepit.

Seven of the females clamored to be as close to Jack as possible. Sam watched with a growing sense of amusement...and a niggling of jealousy.

"They sure seem taken with Jack," Casey said, watching the wiggling and shifting of furry bodies that attempted to sit closer to her CO.

Daniel frowned for a second, glanced at Teal'c and Sam, who were sitting together on the other side of the firepit. "It's possible that they think they're a couple, just as we are," he said, nodding at his teammates.

Sam heard the comments, and frowned slightly. "Colonel?"

Jack had been smiling and nodding at all of the women who seemed determined to crawl into his personal space with him. It was strange, instead of the fur smell he had expected, he was picking up hints of pine...a bit of mint as well. Actually quite pleasant, he thought, taking a deep breath.



Sam's frown deepened. "Maybe you should let them know you're in a relationship?"

"Oh, relax, Carter. They're just being friendly. Besides, we wouldn't want to upset or offend the natives, would we?"

Casey ducked her head. Wondered just how many weeks it would be before Jack had made up for his stupidity. She figured it would be at least a month before he even saw Sam's bed, let alone shared it.

Daniel shook his head. Jack could be an idiot at times, and right now, he was being a colossal idiot. He'd have to explain to his best friend that his life would be miserable until he apologized...profusely. Gifts of flowers would most certainly be necessary. Probably wouldn't hurt to give her jewelry...did Jack have any clue what type of jewelry Sam would like? Better yet...unlimited access to the next new gizmo that they found...or that came through the 'gate. Wouldn't hurt to beg for her forgiveness, either.

For her part, Sam shook her head, and vowed that the next hand-to-hand training session would find her partnered with her CO and soon-to-be ex-lover, if he didn't pull his head out of his ass. She was going to mop the floor with him.

"Daniel Jackson, is there a problem?" Red asked, watching the faces of her visitors.

Daniel's head flew up, he looked at the leader of the Furlings. "Uh...no. You asked how we came to be here...well, the truth is, we have a machine...a robot of sorts. We send it through the Chappa'ai to observe what lies on the other side. This machine takes readings of the atmosphere, soil samples, and makes a visual recording of the area that surrounds the Chappa'ai. When those processes have been completed, the auto redial sequence is activated, and the machine, we call it a MALP, returns to us."


Daniel smiled. "It's an acronym. It stands for Mobile Analytic Laboratory Probe."

"Ah, I see. And this...MALP...told you of our world?"

"Yes, it did. The designation of the planet was in our computer, dialed randomly for exploration. The MALP indicated that there were traces of naquadah in the soil. A UAV, or Unmanned Airborne Vehicle, which flies, was sent through to determine if the planet was occupied or not. We located the ruins of an ancient Furling settlement...or at least we believed it was ancient...and we determined that the two factors made this planet a priority for investigation."

"You seek to mine naquadah?"

"If you would allow it," Daniel replied immediately. "We'd also be interested in seeing the ruins of the settlement. I'd love a chance to study it."

Red smiled indulgently. "Then you shall do so. To mine however, we would need to reach an agreement. A trade of sorts." Her eyes went to, and lingered for a moment, on Jack. A movement Daniel missed as he reached into his pack for his journal.

"Of course," Daniel smiled. "We can offer food, medical equipment, farming equipment, scientific equipment..." His voice trailed off. He was speaking with a Furling. A member of a race so far advanced of his own that anything he...they...could offer, would be the equivalent of offering stone axes and hammers.

"I am certain you have much to offer us. We are a simple people, we have lived as our ancient ancestors did for many years. The...technology...of our people was lost to us when we were attacked by the Goa'uld, and driven nearly to extinction," Red replied gently, sensing his sudden unease, surmising the reason for it.

"Oh," Daniel said...more than a bit surprised. "Why don't you tell me what you would find acceptable, and I'll let you know if we have it, or if our government might approve of the trade."

"Very well. For the negotiations, however, I must speak with the leading female of your group. It is the way things are done," the Furling said, almost apologetically.

It was apparent that the Furlings, or this particular group at any rate, was a very matriarchal society. As far as rank went, Sam was the leading female of the team, she was second-in-command. She didn't, however, speak Goa'uld fluently. She knew basic commands. Recognized technical terms and phrases. Casey spoke Goa'uld almost as well as Teal'c. "Sam, the 'head' female of the team has to negotiate," he said softly to his teammate.

"She's willing to offer a deal for naquadah?" Sam asked excitedly.

"Well, at least a deal for mining it," Daniel replied. "But...uh...Red...I can't even begin to pronounce her name," he said, bringing smiles to both Casey's and Sam's faces, "Insists that the negotiations have to be done between females."

"Let Casey do it, she speaks the language better than I do," the major said quickly.

He nodded. "My Wife will speak for us," he told Red, nodding at Casey. "She speaks Goa'uld fluently, and any questions she has, she can ask Sam about. Sam...er...Major Carter is our second-in-command."

"This is acceptable," Red nodded. Again her eyes went to Jack. Who was starting to get a bit warm, considering the number of fur-covered females that were literally pressing against him. She could see the beads of perspiration on his forehead, could smell the heady scent of healthy male pheromones. Her body was beginning to react to the scent, her fur turning from deep scarlet to crimson. Several of the other females were showing the signs of arousal as well. "Let us begin at once."

While he was thrilled to note that the Furlings seemed more than willing to bargain with them for naquadah, Daniel was beginning to worry at how quickly the negotiations seemed to be moving. Usually it took several hours to reach an agreement to even discuss a treaty. Perhaps, he thought, the Furlings were in more dire straits than they wanted to let on. Maybe simple things like food and clothing were desperately needed. Well, maybe not clothing. Not one of the females were wearing one scrap of cloth or leather. "Of course."

Red pointed at the mats on either side of her. Sam and Casey moved to sit near the leader of the Furlings. A blue furred female settled beside Casey, sitting as the second for her people. Daniel moved to sit next to Teal'c. As soon as Casey had moved, three more females surged forward, attempting to get closer to Jack.

"Daniel Jackson, do you find the behavior of these...women...to be a bit..."

"Odd?" Daniel finished, when Teal'c seemed to be struggling to find the correct word to describe what was happening. "Yeah, I do."

"Perhaps your observation that they view us as 'taken' is the reason we are being ignored."

He glanced at the Jaffa. Was the giant man jealous that he didn't find himself the recipient of such adoring treatment? Surely not. "Wishing that a few Furlings were cozying up to you?"

"I am not. I am however concerned that O'Neill might be in danger of becoming the center of unwanted attention."

"I have to admit, it is a bit disconcerting," Daniel replied. He half-listened to the discussion between Red and Casey, watching as Jack continued to be pressed against by numerous furry bodies. Something else was strange about the situation, but he had yet to put his finger on what it was.




Casey had taken the journal Daniel had started writing in, which had been returned to him as soon as Red had led them toward the building, accepting it from him with a smile of love that was unmistakable. She began to carefully write down all of the things that Red, as Daniel had called her, was listing as welcomed goods for mining rights in two of the areas known to be rich with naquadah. An agreement was quickly reached for testing to be undertaken, to determine the amount of the ore available, with the understanding that if it was an insufficient amount, no mining would occur, and thus the adherence to the treaty would be unnecessary. For that, all they had to offer was a bit of cloth...like the clothes that she and Sam were wearing. If all they wanted were a few BDUs, she was certain General Hammond would be more than willing to part with a few uniforms.

Sam glanced at what Casey was writing. So far, there wasn't anything on the list that could be considered a deal breaker. In fact, it wasn't anything more than what had been provided to several planets for no more than a few plants. It was actually pretty generic...wool blankets; solar lanterns; miscellaneous medical supplies, mostly aspirin and antibiotic creams; seed packets of various food producing plants...or seedlings of the same. There was a notation that the Furlings would like a bit of the naquadah that was mined, no more than a few pounds of the raw metal. Given the weight of the ore, that would be just one or two small chunks of rock. There was nothing that would raise any 'red flags' among the brass who had to approve the treaty.

By the time the women who made up the 'negotiating teams', Sam and Casey for the Tau'ri; Red and the woman with beautiful light blue fur...whose name had so many syllables it sounded like a sentence, whom Casey simply referred to as 'Blue'...had completed their business, agreeing that the simple list and the terms spelled out were sufficient to hold each signing party to the terms of the treaty, the sun was beginning to set.

Unsure of what was happening among the group of multicolored females who surrounded Jack, (who didn't seem at all concerned or upset by his position), Daniel had focused his attention on what Casey and Red were saying as they negotiated, noting with pride that his Wife was doing an excellent job of being diplomatic. She had smiled a time or two at something Red had whispered, gave what seemed to be lengthy responses, but when nothing was added to the paper in front of her, he didn't think anything about it. He had noticed, however, that by the time his Wife and teammate and the two Furling females had finished the negotiations, the females who had been near Jack were all sporting fur that ranged from deep plum to light lavender. That the fur had been a rainbow of colors when they had arrived made him wonder what exactly had caused the change.

Red rose to her feet. Smiled at the females who clustered around Jack. Who was still sweating and smiling. "Let us feast together, in honor of our new friendship, and the treaty that now exists between our peoples."

"You do understand," Casey said quickly, "that my leaders must review this, and make the final decision. I don't foresee any problems, and Sam and I will gladly sign today, as you've asked us to do."

The Furling nodded. "That is acceptable, Casey. I understand that you are emissaries for your people."

Casey sighed with relief. "Yes, we are. It is only on rare occasions that our leaders object to treaties we've negotiated, though. Those are usually with civilizations who are less open and friendly."

The Furling's smile went wider. "I am glad you do not count us in that number."

"Not at all," Casey replied. "Your requests are actually very reasonable."

Daniel and Teal'c had stood when the women had done so. He walked to where his Wife stood, slipped his arm around her waist. "You did a great job."

She smiled, her cheeks flushing slightly from the praise. "Thanks."

He turned to Red. "This is the first treaty my Wife has negotiated for," Daniel said proudly.

"Then I am doubly honored," Red replied, bowing her head slightly in Casey's direction. "To be chosen as worthy of a diplomatic 'first' makes our treaty all the more special."

"Yes, it does," Casey smiled.

Blue moved to stand beside Red. "Let us speak no more of treaties tonight. It is time to celebrate."

Daniel quickly translated for Sam, Jack and Teal'c.

"A feast? Sweet," Jack said, rising slowly to his feet. Assisted by four females who began to twitter and giggle, reaching out to stroke his arm or chest. One female boldly ran a finger over his jaw, which was darkened with five o'clock shadow. Received a wink and a smile in return.

"Um...doesn't the fact that these...uh...women...are covered with fur bother you in the least?" Daniel asked.

"Not really," Jack replied. He'd moved past the feeling of revulsion a couple of hours earlier. Probably due to the undivided and very positive attention he was getting. Besides, fur covered or not, there were some fine sets of breasts pointed in his direction, couldn't miss that. He had noticed the color change, but had no idea what was going on. The pheromones that surrounded him, that had him aroused, although not to the point of erection...not yet...were so subtle as to be unnoticeable to him.

Sam quirked an eyebrow.

"Oh, give me a break," Jack grumped. "You know you're the only woman for me!"

"You'd better not forget it...Sir," Sam said, her voice calm, but her eyes shooting sparks at her lover. She'd waited too long, loved him too long. She'd fight for him if she had to.


The group emerged from the building to find a large fire burning in what seemed to be the center of the village. The aroma of roasting meat filled the air...apparently the men of the tribe had been busy hunting dinner while the women had been taking care of bargaining with the strangers who had arrived through the Chappa'ai.

Teal'c pointed out the assortment of drums that were clustered to one side of the communal area.

"Dinner and a show?" Jack asked. Trying to work his way loose from the grip of two very purple, very tenacious admirers.

"Looks like," Daniel replied.

"Has anyone else noticed the abundance of lavender and plum and lilac and-" Casey started, looking around, a slight frown on her face.

"And every other shade and hue of violet?" Sam finished. "Yes, I have. I also noticed that it started with the wo...females...who were closest to Ja-...the Colonel."

"Carter, I swear, it's not my fault."

"No, it's not," Daniel murmured. "He was the only male in our group who appeared unattached."

Sam frowned. She had been walking beside Teal'c when they had entered the village, Casey and Daniel were holding hands, and Jack had been led in first...oh, crap.

"I might be totally wrong here...but it's possible that the color change is due to...um...well..." Casey blushed.

"Spit it out, Radar," Jack said.

"Sexual arousal."

"Say what?" If Jack had been trying to free himself before, he quadrupled his efforts to break free of the females who continued to push as close to him as possible. He didn't mind their attention...didn't find them repugnant by any means...but sex? No way in hell was that happening! The last time he'd fallen for that, he'd wound up married and had aged fifty years in a matter of days!

"I think she's right, Jack. It might be some sort of mating thing," Daniel said, trying not to laugh. He'd been in the unenviable position of having been targeted as a healthy male specimen a time or two. Not counting Hathor, which he pushed from his mind anytime those memories even attempted to surface, there were several other worlds where he had been chosen as someone's mate, husband, lover, or DNA donor. It wasn't nearly as exciting as it sounded. It was, in fact, usually very annoying, and once or twice downright frightening.

"You'd better think of some way to get us out of here," Jack growled.

"We can't leave before the feast," Casey objected. "The treaty-"

"To hell with the treaty! My dignity is in danger here!"

Sam began to snicker in spite of herself, understanding that what was happening was not mutual from Jack's standpoint. Teal'c turned his head to watch several of the hunters, his cheek twitching noticeably. Casey ducked her head, hiding her smile behind her hand as she faked a cough.

Daniel grinned from ear to ear. "Not so funny when you're the one in their clutches, is it?"

"Daniel, don't make me hit you."

"Jack, just relax. We'll explain that you and Sam are..." Daniel looked from Sam to Jack. "Um...maybe we should tell them you're at least betrothed. I don't think just being lovers is going to be enough to restrain these...um...lovely...uh...ladies...from lavishing you with their affections."

"Indeed," Teal'c said. "It is quite obvious that there would be no difficulties for you to mate with these...ladies."

"Mate? With them? They're Furlings! They look like Bigfoot!" Jack exploded. Almost moaned out loud when he felt a firm pair of breasts pressing against his back, he could swear he felt hard nipples poking into him...and his body was responding. When his cock began to twitch, he did moan out loud.

"Jack?" Daniel asked quietly.

The older man just shook his head wearily, even though he was still trying to get away from his adoring followers.

It wasn't like he made it a habit of looking at men's crotches, Daniel thought, feeling his own cheeks warm as he checked Jack. Yep, his best friend was starting to sport a hard-on, and if he didn't miss his guess, there were pheromones at play. He frowned slightly. As many...purple ladies...as their were, he and Teal'c should be getting at least a whiff or two of the pheromones. "Teal'c?"

The Jaffa turned. "Yes, Daniel Jackson?"

"Are you feeling...okay? Not...um...uncomfortable or anything?"

"I am quite well, thank you. Why do you inquire of my health?"

"Not so much your health...exactly. Just wondering why we aren't reacting to the pheromones that Jack apparently is," Daniel replied quietly.

It only took a glance for Teal'c to surmise the situation as well. "Perhaps the fact that O'Neill is immersed in the pheromones is the cause for his...reaction."

"That has to be it," Daniel nodded.

"Uh...I hate to bother you two during your little tête-à-tête, but do you think you could help me out here?" Jack grumped.

Before Daniel could utter a word, hopefully get Jack at least a bit of breathing room, Red hurried toward them. She was smiling, her gaze lingered on the team commander for several long seconds. From the look in her eye, Daniel had the sinking feeling that he knew what was about to happen.

"It has been many years since we've had a new male in our midst," Red started. Daniel could have sworn he could see a blush on the skin beneath the nearly purple fur on her face. "It is with much joy that we welcome your Ker-nah-al Jak Oh-neh-al. He is a most...pleasing...specimen, and will add much to our genetic pool."

It was all he could do to keep his jaw from hitting the ground. He watched the female Furling nearly pant over Jack for a few more seconds, before she turned and walked away, rejoining several of the other lavender and lilac and plum and violet and purple females.

When Jack saw Daniel's eyes go wide, he knew something was very wrong. "Daniel? Wanna share with the rest of the class?"

"Um...well, it seems that you're to make a donation...or two or three...to the Furling gene pool."


"I don't think it's done in a laboratory, either," Daniel said. "Hope you took some vitamin B before we left. I think you're in for a very long night."

"I hate you," Jack snarled.

"I know," Daniel replied easily.

"What the hell is it with aliens? Hathor wanted my body as an incubator for snakes, the Asgard wanted my DNA for their cloning process, now the Furlings want my sperm? What am I, a walking body donor?"

"You should be honored, Jack. The Furlings don't accept just any male who comes along. I mean, truthfully, I don't understand why they're ignoring Teal'c and I. We're much better examples of human males in their prime," Daniel teased.

"Oh hardee har har."

Casey hurried over to where the men stood talking. "Jack, Red wants your signature on the treaty. She says that as the leader of SG-1, you have to sign. Then as the leader of her people, she will sign, and then Sam, Blue, and I will sign as being the negotiators."

"If we get this damned treaty signed, can we go home?"

She pulled her lip between her teeth, her green eyes showing her unease. She glanced at Daniel.

"Casey? We can sign and go home, right?" Jack persisted.

"Well, not exactly."

"What do you mean, 'not exactly'?"

She looked at the ground, kicked her toe into the dirt, the boot leaving a deep impression. "After the feast, Sam and I can take the treaty to our leaders."

"Uh huh. What about us?" Jack asked, motioning to himself, Daniel and Teal'c.

"Well, they seem to believe that Teal'c and Sam are a couple, and Red says that the love between Daniel and I is unmistakable. So they said that of course our mates can return with us."

"And me?"

"Well, boss, it seems that they have their hearts set on you staying until we return."

Jack glanced over to where Sam was kneeling, going through her pack for some damned reason. When she glanced up, he was certain he could see a smirk on her face. "I am not amused."

"It will only be for a couple of hours, at the most," Daniel replied. "We can stipulate that nothing can happen until we return."

Jack grabbed at the bit of hope that was offered to him. "That's good, Danny, really good. Think it will work?"

"I have no idea," the archaeologist sighed. "I can only hope."

"What if we leave Teal'c here, to see to it that Jack isn't...um...sampled...before we get back?" Casey asked.

"Yeah, Big Guy, you can protect me, right?"

"I will endeavor to do so. However, it has been my experience that when a large group of women are sexually aroused, neither heaven nor hell can prevent them from finding a man to copulate with."

Jack stared. This was a hell of a time for the Jaffa to be trying out another damned joke!

Casey was giggling, her face pressed against Daniel's shoulder. Daniel had one hand to his mouth, staring at the ground as he struggled to keep from laughing out loud.

"Yeah, that's right, yuk it up! Daniel, get me out of this!" Jack demanded.

"One other thing," Casey said, unable to keep the grin from her face. "Red said that the signature of our leader, and she has agreed to accept General Hammond as such, must be added to the treaty. When it's returned, then we can bring in the mining crews."

Daniel nodded. "It could be a simple case of trying to make certain we don't just disappear. They asked for the most basic of necessities. It's possible that this group won't survive without them."

Casey nodded. "That was my first thought, too."

Jack scrubbed a hand over his face, not easy to do, considering there were still three Furling females hanging onto him. "Do what you have to do. The sooner, the better. And make sure they know that I am not doing anything until you get back!"

Daniel snickered. Teal'c snorted.

"Right, boss. You'll make those DNA donations as soon as we return," Casey smirked.

"You're a smartass, Jackson. That's not what I meant, and you know it!"

"Relax, Jack. Nothing is going to happen until after the feast anyway," Daniel said, trying to calm his nearly panicked friend.

"Yeah, easy for you to say. It's not you they want to screw into submission!" Jack growled.

Daniel lost his battle, and began to roar with laughter.

"I hate you," Jack repeated, his eyes narrowed. Even as his memory tried to push to the front all of the times Daniel had been in a similar predicament, and how much he had enjoyed the younger man's embarrassment and discomfort. Not going there, he thought peevishly. This was different. This was him! At least the women offered to or demanding a piece of Daniel were human. Okay, there was that one...she was sort of a lizard...Daniel had thought the people might have been related to the Unas. That 'priestess' had wanted the fair-haired archaeologist in the worst way. But he hadn't been in any real danger of having to stay or mate with her, the clan leader had understood that it wasn't going to happen. But, these were...Furlings...for crying out loud! As in very furry women. Females, his mind quickly corrected, even as his cock twitched again when the lilac one started running her fingers around his collar. And they were very serious about wanting him!

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